More Funny and Humorous Sayings

Funny sayings:

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.

Judging by what's considered good, clean fun these days, the straight and narrow has gotten a lot wider.

A good time to keep your mouth shut is when your in hot water

I don't have hot flashes I have shore private vacations in the tropics.

Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought of half as good (inside)Luckily, this is not difficult.

(outside of card) It is amazing how quickly the kids learn how to drive a car (inside of card) Yet unable to understand the lawnmower, snowblower, or vacuum cleaner HANG IN THERE

Men, Coffee, Chocolate the richer the better.

Always forgive your enemies, Nothing annoys them so much

I sorted all the clothes in my closet into thin and now

I'd like mornings better is they started later

Give a man a fish and you feed him for the day...Teach a man to fish and you get rid of him on weekends.

I don't suffer from insanity...I enjoy every minute of it.

When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on!

Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.

If you know how much time I put into this card you'd keep it forever.

The way some people find fault you'd think there was a reward.

I can't be creative and neat at the same time.

To error is human...To duct tape is a man thing.

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory

Sometimes it's just easier to ride the horse in the direction it's going

Why is bra singular and pantry plural?

My name is ________________ and I'm a "stampaholic".

The Rooster may crow... but the hen delivers the goods.

If time waits for no one...How come they are always stopping the clock at football games?

Be silly Always… Be Regretful Never!

There are many more funny quotes on the Disney page, click here.

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This card handcrafted by Mary Lynn.

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Mary Lynn

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Every effort has been made to give proper credit to the author of each of the funny quotes and sayings on this site. If there has been any oversight on my behalf please contact me and I will remove the quotation or give the proper acknowledgment.

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